The Divorced Dadvocate: Divorce Support For Dads
The Divorced Dadvocate: Divorce Support For Dads is a weekly podcast designed specifically for fathers navigating divorce. It addresses the unique challenges men face and offers practical guidance, emotional support, and real-life insights to help dads survive — and ultimately thrive — during and after divorce.
Each episode combines honest conversation, personal stories, and action-oriented advice to help listeners rebuild confidence, create healthy co-parenting strategies, manage finances, navigate court complexities, and heal emotionally. Since launching in 2020, the show has become a trusted resource and supportive community for divorced and divorcing dads.
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DISCLAIMER: The purpose of this podcast is to inform, not influence. It is not a substitute for professional care or advice by a qualified professional. The host, as well as guests who speak on this podcast, express their own opinions, experience, and conclusions, and The Divorced Dadvocate podcast & website neither endorses nor opposes any particular views discussed here.
The Divorced Dadvocate: Divorce Support For Dads
282 - REPLAY: 6 Practical Ways To Reduce Holiday Stress During Divorce
The holidays can feel like a minefield when you’re navigating divorce: shifting schedules, tighter budgets, and a swirl of emotions for you and your kids. We unpack a practical, human-centered plan to steady the season, built around six core habits that reduce pressure and bring back meaning without the overwhelm.
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Hello and welcome to the Divorced Dadvocate, divorce support for dads, where we help dads create a healthy and less traumatic divorce. My name is Jude Sandval, and I'm your host. I created this podcast in the Divorced Advocate community as a result of my own high conflict divorce, and because you, as a dad, deserve all the resources necessary to thrive through this challenging time. I encourage you to check out our website at thedivorcedadvocate.com, where there are resources that correspond to this episode, as well as free access to our membership community, where you will find live meetings, free workshops and courses, private discussion groups, and more. And now on to this week's episode. Hello and welcome to this week's episode. I am so pleased that you are here, and we are going to start this week with a little bit of working through and talking about how to handle the holidays while going through divorce. We've already started this offline with a couple of what I'm calling emergency workshops. We talked the first week about handling your emotions during the holidays. And then just last night, we did a workshop around the five tips for parents on managing holiday stress. And if you weren't able to tune in to those, we did live stream those as well on LinkedIn and Facebook. If you didn't see those, you can you can visit those on LinkedIn and Facebook. And if you haven't connected with me on LinkedIn and Facebook, please do. Or if you want to see the replay, you can check that out at the website under the podcast tab under the membership podcast area there. And if you're not already a member, check it out. There's a free trial going on right now that you can get access to all the resources that the divorced advocate community has at the website for free. So check that out as well. And on that note, let's jump into today's topic, which is I'm going to take it to the next, not the next level, but just something else, which is six tips for a stress-free holiday season. And, you know, for many people, the quote, most lovely time of the year can quickly morph into the quote, most stressful period of the year. And typically holiday stressors, when combined with a mental condition, can trigger an optimal tornado of heightened stressors, illnesses, and difficulties if we don't manage those effectively. And during the holiday periods, there are potential dangers at every turn. And you throw in the fact that uh you're going through a divorce and things are changing rapidly and things are kind of chaotic and uncertain, and that just adds to it. All that, uh all these circumstances also can be exacerbated by symptoms of people who suffer depression or anxiety, PTSD, or any other psychological disorders. And so holiday stress factors can can also include complex and challenging family dynamics at family functions or grief over the loss of a loved one, or grief over the loss of a relationship, or a family dynamic, or simply trying to live up to the unrealistic expectations of the quote, ideal holiday. There's a there's an interesting statistic here from Life Hack, and it and they say, quote, are your holidays filled with relaxation and quality time with family, or are you resorting to drinking a little too much eggnog to make it through? If you are, you're not alone. 90% of Americans who completed a survey indicated that they feel stressed during the holidays, and 24% experience difficulty with family members. So, you know, while this festive season is filled with joy, the sheer number of activities and errands that you were gonna go through to be prepared for for the festivities can be really, really hectic. But don't fret. There's there's some things you can do to ensure the holiday season is going to be packed with more fun than than stress and and anxiety. So let's talk about that. Let's uh let's go through these six tips for a stress-free holiday season. Number one, and this is a big one that I've really started to started to work into my life over, let's see, about the last year, year and a half since I was working with a coach. And yes, I am a coach and I work with a coach. Uh it's just become a lifestyle now because I see the benefits of getting some help in my life. But that is to plan and create a working holiday schedule. And some of you regular listeners may have heard me talking about block scheduling and putting uh your daily uh routines and all of what you're going to do into a schedule and into your calendar so that you're paying attention to what you've got going on all the time and maximum maximizing the time in your day that's that you're doing different tasks and also being able to account for those as well because what gets measured gets done. And so you know, having this plan for the holidays is gonna prior to getting into it, is gonna help you to organize everything so that you're not caught off guard. And you know, this includes all of the events that you might be required to or or that you're being requested of going to. And we're gonna talk a little bit about saying no to some of these coming up in one of the next tips, but also being on top of and organized in things, particularly during this transitionary period, whether you're going through the divorce at this time right now and things are uncertain, or even if you're post-divorce and this kind of new routines or you're creating new uh experiences for the kids, or it's just a little bit different than the dynamic that you've been experiencing when you were all together as a family. So, you know, instead of burying your head in the sand or drinking too much eggnog, like my intros stated, just pay attention to this stuff. Plan ahead, plan according accordingly, and it's just gonna keep you from getting caught off caught off a couple things. One, getting caught caught off guard at the last minute and maybe missing something or not showing up how you want to, or you know, not getting a plan or figuring stuff out. And we definitely don't want to do that. The other thing it's gonna allow you to do is really be able to communicate what's going on with the kiddos. Because, hey, if you can imagine the feelings and emotions that you're going through in the uncertainty and potentially sadness or whatever grieving process you're going through during this, your kiddos are as well. So sharing with them kind of the expectations around what's going to happen during the holiday season is a really phenomenal way to just quell some of those fears that that they'll have and putting the schedule together, creating the the holiday schedule, knowing what you're doing personally, like how when you're buying presents, what parties you're going to, et cetera, but also what that schedule is going to look like with your ex or your soon-to-be ex, and communicating that with the kiddos as to who's going to be with who, on what day, if you have a break and you've got an agreement with how many days you're going to be going, that each one of you are going to have them communicate that with the kids too. If you're going to be going on vacation as well, that's uh good to communicate so that they know and understand what's going to be happening, and also have something to look forward to as well. So the first tip to stress-free holiday season is plan and create a working holiday schedule. And that's also not to say that that can't be fluid and that can't be changing, that you can add things in, you can delete things and update things and or just go with the flow with things when they don't work out well. I just got an accident on a week from Saturday, and we got rear-ended, and we kind of had to, we were on our way to some some holiday celebrating and and like a Christmas celebration. So we kind of we had to go with the flow with that. So uh so life brings up some of these circumstances and just trying to to control how we react and and how we show up when they they when they appear is the only thing that we can control during this this chaotic and uncertain period of time during divorce. So number two, learn how to say no in a polite manner. So again, this is incredibly important. You're gonna be potentially inundated with solicitations from friends and relatives and others during the holiday season. And you may have some things that you feel like you are you're required to do and you're required to show up for, you're required to be involved with. And so take this opportunity. If you are like me, or or like I was, and and less so now, saying no was really, really hard for me. Saying no to requests to help, saying no to going to parties, saying no to help with parties, saying no to whatever it might be was just difficult and uncomfortable. So I wanted to, my codependent nature wanted to be able to do everything that I could possibly do for everybody in order to get the the love that I was needing. And it was all dependent upon my ability to perform. And during the holidays, that was exacerbated because it's just seems to be more going on. And you add in everything I just described with the the changing environment and all the different circumstances, and that becomes kind of difficult to say no. So make sure that you're taking, and we're going to talk about this coming up too, is uh taking care of yourself by saying no to the things that that you just are are not needing to or willing to be involved with at the time, at this time. And that doesn't mean that you can't revisit those to do it in or do it again next year, but you can do it simply in in a nice manner and a polite manner, which is I just don't have the capacity to do that this year, or I'm I'm very sorry, but I can't I can't do that this year. I appreciate it. However, you want to do it, however you feel comfortable in doing it, but make sure just to reflect. Take the time yourself to reflect on whether this is gonna serve you, whether you need to say no, and that's gonna better serve you by doing that. Yes, there might be people that are upset about it. Yes, your kids might get upset if things are changing or you're doing something different and you're saying no to some things that you otherwise would have been saying yes to or that they're used to. But just rest assured that they will there will be there will be a positive outcome to it in the the setting of boundaries by saying no is one of those things that can lead to that positive outcome. So make sure to learn how to say no in a polite manner. That's number two. Stay with us. We'll be right back. Hey fellas, it's me. I'm hitting pause on this episode for a second because I need to talk to you. Are you listening right now, feeling overwhelmed, stuck, worried about your kids, your finances are just what comes next? You know I get it, and that's why I started this podcast. But I also know that listening is one thing, and having a personal advocate, a coach in your corner is another. Listening gives you information, coaching gives you a plan. It's where we work one-on-one to cut through the confusion, build your roadmap, and make sure you're not just surviving this divorce, but setting yourself up to thrive after it. I want you to walk into the new year with clarity and control. So, as a thank you for being a loyal listener, I'm offering 25% off one-on-one coaching booked between now and the end of the year. This isn't just a discount. It's an investment in your future and your family. Don't wait for January 1st to feel lost again. Let's get you a plan now. Visit the coaching tab at thedivorcedavicate.com and enter dad's 25 at checkout. That's dad's 25 at checkout on the coaching tab at thedivorcedavic.com. Claim your 25% discount and let's get to work. All right, let's get back to the show. Number three, stress-free, number three tip for a stress-free holiday season. Define and adhere to a budget. I was just reading this week something about the massive increase in debt that is happening, credit card debt, particularly with Americans right now since the pandemic. So I don't want to speculate as to what that might be or why that might be with some of these record inflation and some of these economic challenges that we're facing, I'm sure, are part of it. But the holidays always seem with our commercialized society in general about purchasing and buying things and going through stuff. Uh, but the worry of money is already exacerbated. I'm not telling you uh during divorce, I'm not telling you probably anything that you're not already experiencing. It's a simple math equation: one household into two households equals less money and more expenses. So worrying about money during the holiday season probably is not something that we want to add to this our already challenging burden that we have. So make sure to create a budget. Make sure that it's realistic for yourself and that you're not doing things that are outside of what is comfortable for you. Again, going back to number two, learning to say no to things is okay. And also being creative is really a good thing. I know there were some very, very lean Christmases in in our house over the past decade post-divorce and during the divorce, particularly, that was very challenging. And I had to come up with some creative ways to still celebrate the season and stay in the spirit of the season and still make it something that was memorable for my daughters. And I really can look back now and say some of the stuff that I had no idea would have such an impact. Some of those creative and silly things that that we did simply out of necessity are some of the things that they remembered and they do remember and that they comment on and that we continue to do now more than the other things and or the other gifts or or some of the other stuff that's that I thought would be more meaningful for them. So this just goes to the point of trusting in the process that there is a there is something happening and working in in our lives and in our kids' lives that we don't know. We don't know what the positive outcomes are going to be for them and what their experiences are going to be for them and what they're needing to learn from these experiences going through this. So I have the benefit of hindsight, almost a decade forward in this and being able to look and see and say that. I know if you're in the middle of this, that is hard to see, and it might be incredibly hard to grasp, particularly with all of these emotions and feelings coming up, and maybe some shame and guilt throughout this, but I assure you that there are positive outcomes ahead and doing stuff like creatively finding experiences or doing things like homemade gifts or or finding experiences as opposed to buying something for uh for the kiddos or in in a way that you can celebrate the the season can be a really phenomenal way in which to uh assist you in adhering, defining and adhering uh a budget that's going to be comfortable for you through this holiday season. Now, you know, that's also not to say that there might be a little bit of pushback or disappointment from kids, but they are resilient. And I know that if you're listening to this and and you're trying to do the best thing that you can possibly do to get through this, that's going to bring up emotions. Emotions for me, it was emotions of shame and feeling like I'm not a good dad, and that's there's something wrong with me. And that is a difficult thing. Just know there's nothing wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with the father that you are, and you are working incredibly hard and making a great effort. And by doing it differently, doing it creatively, creating experiences that are meaningful and less about things is a positive thing, particularly in the commercialized emphasis of the season and just basically the commercialization and the retail mentality around this whole holiday season. So keep that in mind. Try to reframe your mindset uh around that. We're gonna talk about in step six how we can do that a little bit. But before we get to that step six, let's talk about step number four, which is solicit assistance and delegate responsibilities, right? Everything that is going through this season because, hey, we still got to work, we still got to make a living, we still got to reply to the attorneys. We might need to do financial disclosures. It's just a guy who's on the workshop last night that gets to go to mediation just a couple of days right before Christmas. I remember I think we had a I had a hearing just uh before was it just before Christmas or in between in between Christmas and New Year's, years back, four or five years back, that just really weighed on my mind. So you'll you you add in to that to work parties, and then maybe you have the kids that are gonna be off of school now, and then you've got your parenting time and how you're gonna manage that while you're still working and daycare for the kids while they're at home. And guys, I know it's uh it's a it's a lot. So make sure that you are not shy about soliciting assistance and delegating responsibility. So let's talk about soliciting assistance, and that can be with family members, that can be with friends, that can be finding a community of people that can support you. That can be a church community, it can be the divorced advocate community here as well. We had uh lots of guys over to uh the house here in Denver, Colorado during Thanksgiving last week. We've got our holiday party coming up tomorrow night, which is by the time you listen to this, it will have been Saturday night previous to this being launched. But we've got 50 plus people coming to that as well. And if you don't have a community, perhaps think about starting uh a community of divorced or divorcing dads in and around where you're at there. Part of my journey and experience was starting to do that because I could not find the community of divorced or divorcing dads and the resources that I needed. And so I started this divorced advocate community to be able to give you guys the community that you deserved and that you needed going through this process. So, hey, no time, no, no better time. And if you if we can't find it, we create it, right? So don't be afraid to solicit that assistance and get involved, get involved in our community with the the free uh the through the free group coaching that we do on semi-monthly meeting every every month. We've also got the the workshops going on as well. Check all those out under the events page that we have at the divorced advocate.com website. You'll see we've got office hours for members as well to just show up and talk about anything that you've got going on. We've got some experts that are getting involved and help uh helping the guys to talk about and get through and work on some of the stuff that they're working on through this, whether that's co-parenting or managing the stress or budgeting or whatever we might be talking about. So get involved with our community if you don't have one as well. And then the delegating responsibilities one, this is the one that I also had to learn very the very hard way. Like if you've listened to me enough, basically I learned everything the hard way, right? It's basically pounding my head against the wall and God saying over and over again, yeah, well, you haven't figured this one out quite yet. So here's uh here's another to figure out and and deal with until you figure until you've it's sunk into your head, Jude. But delegating the responsibilities, and and I'm gonna talk about that in the context of with our kiddos. And I initially started really being super dad at the at the beginning, at the onset of post-divorce life and trying to handle everything and get it done and not show any weakness or emotions to my daughters, and you know, making sure that that experience was gonna be exactly the same that they experienced their whole life and not dealing, not dealing with all the feelings and emotions that I was coming up because I was just gonna be strong and suck it up and deal with it and be a man. And you know, that was just a recipe for disaster because I literally burnt myself out and got sick and made myself miserable and upset. And then that would learn would that would lead to just you know unhealthy interactions and blowing up because I just was so stressed out. So I say all that to say soliciting responsibilities to the kiddos, it can be a really good opportunity to help them to get involved, get involved with this season, this time of the season. And if the kids are off school and they have time on their hands, it's in and you're needing to send out your Christmas cards. I'm just gonna use this as an example. You still want to send out Christmas cards, but you know, you don't want to have to go out and buy them or do the photos and pay for that. It could be an opportunity to do something creative like creating homemade gifts, homemade cards with them. And you can sit down and do that and delegate those responsibilities for them to create some Christmas cards that you'll send out to everybody. And I don't know about you, but the ones that come that are the most, the most unique that I found that I love are the Christmas cards that are either homemade, handmade, or handwritten, or are letters of what's happened with everybody in their uh family in that particular year, which is more memorable and more meaningful, at least to me. But anyway, that's just that is just an example of a way in which you can delegate responsible responsibility to the kiddos and helping them to celebrate this season. And it also empowers them to control their own feelings and their own abilities throughout this as well and models for them getting through this challenging time in a positive and creative way. This is a creative opportunity in divorce, and I talk about that in the Dad's Divorce Blueprint course that we go through and that you can find in the app as well. If you're a member, you've got free access to that course in the mobile app. But we talk about this as a as a as a creative opportunity to figure out your life 2.0. And we spend a whole section in that dad's divorce blueprint in in talking about that and how to do that. So check that out, but also start doing it. Start trying to figure out a way to delegate that responsibility with the kiddos. All right, that's number four. Number five is set aside time for yourself and self-care. Yes, I am a broken record about that. You uh heard it on the workshop if you were on last night. You heard it in the workshop last week, you hear it on every most of every podcast where we're talking about tips is taking care of yourself. That's a thing, no matter what, during this divorce, you cannot help anybody else. You can't help your kiddos if you're not taking care of yourself. It's the old adage of putting on your own oxygen mask before putting somebody else's on. And so set aside that time. Again, this goes back to step one, which is planning and creating a working holiday schedule that, yes, does include taking or scheduling in your self-care, the workouts, the therapy, the coaching, or the 12-step or the uh church community, whatever that might be, your spiritual development, your mental, emotional time, all four pillars or all four legs of that stool, mental, emotional, physical, spiritual. Make sure that you do create that time during the holiday period. Right now, I was just lamenting the fact that I just feel really off with my schedule because of the Thanksgiving holiday. And I had two kiddos out of town, and I have one kiddo here, and then we were in the mountains, and my schedule, it's just all out of whack. And I'm just trying to get that on this week, and it's just all out of whack. And like I mentioned with the car accident, now we have we're down one car and driving kids around. And so, man, I know what it is like. It is life and it is hectic, and you add the divorce in, and there's lots going on, but make sure. And so I'm having to schedule my time. I've I've committed myself to my workout schedule, at least, so it's gone down at least to three days a week. So I'm making sure that I'm exercising three days a week, and that was five days a week, but I just can't get to it now, at least for the time being, at least in these few weeks. So I've just I've just reconciled myself to the fact that it's going to be three days a week. And so let's see, this is I'm recording this on a Friday. I've already got two of those three weeks, so or three days. So I will hit that, that other one. I've got it scheduled in my third day tomorrow morning in order to get that third workout. But again, be uh malleable in that or and also be creative in that. So that workout for for me is has been a little bit different. I I'm usually doing some lifting and some some heavy HIIT training and whatnot, but I've got an injury that's going on, and so I'm having to be creative and also malleable and flexible on what I'm doing. So I'm gonna be doing some more cardio, be doing some swimming in that as well. So again, but just the point being is that you are taking care of that. You are taking care of all those four, four four legs to that stool, the mental, emotional, physical, it's and spiritual. So make sure to set aside that time. You know, part of that might be saying no to one thing, like we said in step two, saying no to one of those holiday parties that you really didn't want to show up to, that you can then go and you can do your workout, or you can schedule your therapy session or your coaching session, or or go to the the the church group or 12-step or or just to get together with another friend or somebody else or family members, or just spend it with the kiddos doing something fun and creative uh as well. So, but just make sure that you do set aside that time for yourself. So that's number five on the fifth tip for stress-free holiday season. And the final one, and I alluded this to a little bit earlier about reframing your mindset and how we can do that is practicing gratitude. Gratitude is the most unbelievable and amazing feeling that you can practice and create in your life that is going to move you in a positive direction, you know, becoming engrossed in these various stressful problems, like I was talking about with the upset of my schedule and no car and kids out of town and my and just feeling like everything is chaotic. And I don't, and I don't even have a divorce going on, guys. So I I empathize and I appreciate you all that you've got going on as well. It's just life. Yeah, divorce in there as well. So how do we how do we do that and how do we stay in gratitude? Because what happens is we can start to ruminate on our past, or and that's gonna start help us to, or that's not gonna help us, that's gonna start us in down that path of feeling sad or depressed about stuff. If we start looking back, we start ruminating on stuff that's going on. Or if we start thinking in the future and we start worrying about what's gonna happen or how things are gonna happen, or what is the future. Future going to look at like, or what are future Christmases or holidays or whatever, like whatever it might be. Getting out of that mindset, because that then starts anxiety and starts worry. So we don't want to be, we want to try to avoid this the stress, or we want to try to avoid the depression and sadness by looking back. We want to start to try to avoid that uh worry and that anxiety by looking forward and stay really present in what's going on right now, what's going on in your life and practicing gratitude can do that because you literally cannot be in two emotions at simultaneously. So you can't be in that sadness or depression by looking and thinking back, or you can't be in that worry and anxiety by looking forward if you can stay present and in gratitude. And so, how do you do that? One way that I do that, and I work with clients in doing that is creating a gratitude list. So a couple of ways. One is if you've if you've listened and you've heard the podcast episode or me going on and on, also about journaling every morning in my one of my journal prompts is I the things that I am grateful for as I wake up that day. So every day I write a gratitude list. Also before bedtime and during our prayers with my daughters, we talk about what each one of us is grateful for in that day. That's another one. One you can do on the fly. And this is a great one, particularly during these, when these emotions are coming up and they're really challenging, and they happen probably, at least for me, they did during times that were really, really inconvenient, that you can stop in, you can, you can, you can get it's called a pattern interrupt. You can interrupt that emotion by simply getting through that emotion for the 20 seconds. You could do it through breathing, but then if you continue to feel like you're you're ruminating in that or you're staying in that that depression or anxiety or whatever that if that that emotion is, you can interrupt that pattern by writing out and just taking five minutes. It doesn't even have to be five minutes, it can be one minute. As many things that you are grateful for that come to your mind in that moment. And look, it doesn't have to be complicated, you don't have to overthink it. It can be, I'm I'm grateful for the opportunity to be grateful. I'm I'm grateful for the pen and paper that I have to write it down, or the cell phone I have that I can call to reach out to somebody, or I can text somebody to be uh to get some help, or that I've got a warm office, or I have the ability to communicate with you guys through this podcast platform or through the membership community or whatever it is. Just write that list of everything that just it's a consciousness of thought, anything that comes into your mind. I'm grateful for my kiddos. I'm grateful for, I'm grateful for the holiday season, I'm grateful, just write as many as you can. If you can write a hundred, then what that's gonna do is that's gonna pull you, it's gonna reframe you, it's gonna pattern interrupt your neural pathways in going back to that that emotional thinking of whatever it was that brought up that sad emotion, depressed emotion, anxious, worry, whatever it is that's coming up and bring you into gratitude and bring you into that present moment. I'm telling you, it is an absolutely miraculous way in which to change the way in which your thoughts are going on the fly. So you can do that. You can do that on your phone, you can write a list electronically on your phone. I think it's great to do it pen to paper. There's something about pen to paper that makes it even more impactful because it's tactile and it registers uh somatically in your body as well. So if you can do that, if you have an office or a comfortable space where you can do it with pen to paper, that is even better. But if not, just even do it in your mind and count out the number of things that you are grateful as you go through those. So that is number six, which is practice gratitude. So let's review those briefly. And that is number one. The first tip for a stress-free holiday season is plan and create a working holiday schedule. Block that schedule out. Make sure to put that in there because if not, things can get stressful because it becomes chaotic and crazy. Number two, learn how to say no in a polite manner. It's okay to say no because that is a form of self-care and setting boundaries and important for you to do. Number three, define and adhere to a budget. If you're going through the divorce, it may already be a stressful uh financial situation, and the thoughts about that make it difficult. Add on top of that, all of the what seemingly feels like the expectations around the holidays and spending money and gifts and everything else. So define it, adhere to a specific budget during this holidays. Number four is solicit assistance and delegate responsibilities. Solicit that assistance and get help from anybody you possibly can and delegate those responsibilities. You can definitely do that with the kiddos and help to help them to feel empowered during this season as well. Number five is set time set aside time for yourself, stay on that self-care, that mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual legs of the stool and do it, even if it is, like I mentioned, a reduced schedule, a reduced amount of time that you spend with that or whatever it might be, but just make sure that you are definitely getting that in. And finally, number six is practice gratitude. And it is the it is the time of season for being grateful for all that we do have, even during this difficult and challenging time during divorce. You can utilize this as an opportunity. I know if you're listening to this, you are of the mindset of being able to do that and model that as an experience for your children who will look to you and going through something that is one of the top things and most challenging things that we go through in our lives and doing that in a manner that is effective and is positive in modeling for your kiddos. So thanks for tuning in this week. I sincerely appreciate it. Please again check out the websites to get involved with all of the resources at the divorced advocate.com. Check out the podcast, the blog, uh, the blogs as well that we've got going on multiple times a week in the events calendar, see what's on there. There's some free resources as well. And then consider becoming a member to uh jump into some more of those deeper deeper things with some of the workshops and classes, as well as the access to more than 50 of those courses on the uh mobile app as well. Thank you so much. Have a great week and God bless. To hear the rest of this episode and access the corresponding resources, visit the divorced advocate.com and become a member of our community. It's free to join and will provide you with the resources you deserve as a divorced or divorcing dad. Thank you for listening. God bless, and I'll talk with you next week.